Tuesday, January 29, 2013

Hello, phone company

I'm wondering whether I need a phone at all.

I suppose a cellphone might be handy in case I drive into a ditch and need a tow, or need to check with my wife whether it's potato salad or potato chips that I should pick up at the supermarket.

I could turn that on when I need to make a call, then turn it off.

But it's becoming increasingly difficult to make a case for a land line.

Pretty much anyone I want to hear from, except maybe the Governor General's office with the news that I have won the Order of Canada, has my eMail address, or my Twitter handle, or my street address.

When the phone rings, it's usually someone I don't want to hear from --- a telemarketer (poor bastards) or a fundraiser or a newspaper selling subscriptions or one of those recorded messages from a local candidate for some public office or other.

Or someone looking for the liquor store (I have no idea why, but we get quite a few of these).

The whole idea that I should interrupt what I'm doing and race to the phone spilling my coffee and tripping over the dog while trying to mute the TV to answer one of these calls so I can tell them as nicely as possible to get lost strikes me as so twentieth century.

Plus the landline is, by definition, IN MY HOME, where I do not want to be bothered by anyone who does not live there or, for that matter, by anyone who does live there.

I signed up for the do-not-call list, but it didn't make much of a difference. People are still bothering me.

To pay for this seems unreasonable. Maybe I'd feel differently if the phone company was paying me, say, a hundred bucks a week. That sounds about right. They can collect it from the guys who want to call me. I'd even promise to listen to their spiels before telling them to get lost.

It'd be like one of those paywalls the newspapers are putting up on their websites.

Call me crazy, but if enough of us cancel our phones, mightn't that happen?

Do I sense the beginning of a movement, or is it just the All-Bran?


  1. Hi Geezer,

    This geezer dropped his land line (and cable service) about a year ago and the sun still comes up in the east. Don't miss it at all. None our four children - ages 39-27 - have land lines.

    You're right - its a dead technology.

    Oh, the secret to successful cell phone use - never give anyone your number. Only use the phone to harass others.


  2. I have no advice. Talking about phones just gets my blood pressure up - but I must say I did enjoy the fact that people phone you to find out where the liquor store is. Certainly puts you in a different light.

  3. More and more people are headed in that direction. I say if you're not using it, just drop it. No point paying for a service you don't need.

  4. It's only old boomers and geezers like us who still have land lines. All the young kids just have cell phones and that's it. Of course, they're on those damn phones 24/7.