Apologies to my late mother, a lifelong monarchist, devotee of all things pertaining to the royal family, and much more accommodating of their occasional misdemeanours and transgressions than she was of mine.
I have nothing against the British monarchy. I hold Queen Liz in highest esteem for unwavering devotion to duty, and for putting up uncomplainingly with the Duke for 64 years. I'm guessing the Queen Mom was probably a bit of a handful, too, when she was in her cups, not to mention number one son hanging about with no firm prospects.
All in all, she need apologize for nothing, and I would welcome her to our shores anytime she wants to take a break from old Blighty for a fortnight in the colonies.
It's just that I don't want her, or Charlie, or William, as our head of state.
It's nothing personal. If William wishes to defect and run for nomination as leader of any of our fine political parties, I think that would be rather sporting. Or perhaps his brother Harry would like to have a go. He seems like a good lad.
But isn't it time for Canada to leave the nest, fly free, poop where it wants to, so to speak?
Doesn't our Prime Minister want to attend get-togethers of heads of state as an actual head of state?
Bottom line, being acutely passive aggressive in the best Canadian tradition, I wish not to offend but, if it should please her majesty at some convenient time, and if the paperwork isn't too burdensome, some of us would take it as a great favour if...
Sorry, I see that I have breached the bounds of propriety, and risked the crown's displeasure.
Forelock tugged, humbly. Happy Canada Day.