Friday, September 25, 2009

This week's episode in the human comedy

It's a funny old world:
• In Polk County, Florida, police raid the home of Michael Defalco, a man with an extensive arrest record. They're on the hunt for drugs and weapons. They find a large screen Wii video game set-up. To the cops' embarrassment, Defalco's hidden security camera records them playing his Wii Bowling for nine hours, at the taxpayers' expense.

• In Cairns, Australia, police are called to a disturbance at the corner of Shields and Abbott streets to find Adam Michael Kelly, 25, dry-humping a parking meter and yelling out: "Yeah baby, you know you want it." In his defence, his lawyer notes that Kelly is celebrating the end of the football season.

• In London, England, men are having their eyebrows plucked, threaded and waxed, all part of a trend to "eyebrow-shaping." that started with guyliner. Debenhams department store plans to hold men-only "guybrow" nights, and says 40 percent of its brow bar clients are male.

• Also in London, Selfridges department store is responding to "soaring" male demand for pantyhose by introducing a line of "mantyhose." To quote Sir Winston Churchill, "...the new view must come, the world must roll forward."

• In Shreveport, Louisiana, a man impersonating a police officer is arrested after pulling over the mayor.

• In Halifax, Nova Scotia, lobster fisherman calling the federal government for information on a stimulus program (no, really!) are greeted by a sultry voice saying, "Hey there hot stuff, I've been waiting for your call...Are you ready for some tantalizing fun?" Turns out the number published on the Fisheries Department website is that of a phone sex service.

• In East Naples, Florida, James Lowe, 59, is hanging out in front of a coin-operated laundry while his pants were being washed inside, all of which he explains to Sheriff's deputies who notice he is naked below the waist.

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